What does it mean to be engaged? Not married, but involved (preferably enthusiastically) with work. Because I just don't see the point.

Things at work are changing again; honestly, I am just over it. I thought I wanted more work responsibility and recognition, but now that everything is on fire and people are looking at me for guidance, I'm kinda like, "Y'all should have listened to the fire prevention advice I've only been shouting for the last year." 

My soul is dying a little bit each day, just like my lucky bamboo in the window, which, as you can see, is not getting enough light now. 

This is not a "cry wolf" situation. It's what I do. I vented to my squad. Finally heard back that I am valid (got gaslit by my previous manager and still working through that ish) and they are working through some of the same. Disgruntled women over a certain age are almost as formidable as today's teens when we can summon up enough energy to deal with other people's bullshit.

I am really looking forward to some much-needed R&R next week. Real sunshine! Not four LED therapy lights placed strategically around my cave of "Contemplation and Caffeine" or something like that. 

Ok, deep breath, good tunes, and clean my desk. The rest of the shit can be dealt with later when I have some literal and metaphorical space to deal with it.